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The Geekery Article Archives
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 Not-So-Funny-Rather-Scary Reader Emails -- Chris || Post in the forum
With an update of just a mere month (or two... possibly three) ago, I decided that it was time to give it another shot and actually do something called "typing" and "thinking" instead of copying and pasting like I've been doing the last 50 or so updates.
We haven’t exactly been idle here at The Geekery over the past several months, it may surprise you to say that we've actually been busy entertaining a slue of readers who decided to write in to us about how much they love the site, love us, love our families, love our attics, love our ability to read, write, and think, and best of all, they love to want to know how to be real hackers. None of those punk ass fake hackers that go around and actually "hack" using old, out of date programs such as DOS.
 | | One reader was clever enough to send me this picture when he said he was looking to download Sub 7, and asked if I had seen it |
It's shocking to know how many people actually want to hack, but don't want to know what a computer or book is. And what's even funnier is that they actually think that asking people who know nothing about hacking will help them. Oh my god, I just began a sentence with "and". This article is going to burst into flames in less than ten seconds.
With the invention of email just a mere six months ago, all the goons seem to be making their way to us and sending us all their cryptic messages (which we like to refer to as 'crap that doesn't make sense since they cannot properly type in English, or not even English at all') for us to decode, and hopefully help them. Well, we never decoded them, and we never helped them. You get the drift where this is going, don't you? Good. Even if you don't get it, good.
Date: January 10, 2003
Subject: hacking (how original)
From: nunya
Message: i have downloaded a sub7 and i dont know how to use it, can u help me?
Anyone that uses "hacking" and only "hacking" as a subject obviously needs serious help, including you, "nunya". I mean, you could have thought of something better like "Help me break into someone's computer so I can go to jail and get a huge ass pounding like I've always wanted" or "Help me! I'm a huge moron that wants the world's largest ass pounding in jail ever!". Maybe if you write back to us using one of those subjects, we'll be willing to actually read the entire message.
Date: January 11, 2003
Subject: Can't get sub7..
From: alex
Every where in the web is impossible to download the program sub7 11/01/03 How come.
Can you send me the program by e mail? Thanks. Please give me your bank account number so you may deposit some money into my Pay Pal account. Only then may I be able to email you the program. After all, sending that stuff isn't cheap, you know. Think of it as hazardous waste, you must pay to have it transported.
Date: January 15, 2003
Subject: Sub7 (How original?)
From: Salem
Ok, I'm not a dumb-ass like the guy who opened the virus and sent the program...
I just need some help. I'm trying to crack someone with sub7, but they have Norton Antivirus. How can I get through this? ... and he may have a firewall because he is linked to a server. Please e-mail me at matty2004@juno.com
Thanks alot You're not related to the Salem Witch Trials, are you, Salem? If you are, you shouldn't have any problems with knowing the history of the Salem Witch trials. Regarding your Sub 7 lack of knowledge, you should design a poster that basically says, "Norton Antivirus: Read me! You don't know what Sub 7 is!" and mail it to your target. This of course must be done in C++ or some other variant of programming language like HTML or even TEXT. Do the same thing for the firewall, except replace "Firewall" for "Norton Antivirus" and you should be all set.
Date: January 20, 2003
Subject: wtf?
From: masterkeygen
ok i was browsing around looking at fellow hax0r web sits when i ran across yours wtf telling people to hold down control and alt and hit deleat 4 times that will fuck up your shit quick!!! and that is being a lamer!!!!!!<<>> "fellow hax0r" sites... "wtf?" Hitting the "ctrl + alt + delete" key sequence will not "fuck up" someone's "shit", and will only really work if they're running something less than or equal to Windows 98 since now all flavors of Windows display a bunch of other options when hitting those keys. Oh wait... I know... you're running Windows 95 and you did that, didn't you? I so sorry, I didn't think anyone would actually try it. Seriously. I'm sorry, man.
Date: January 24, 2003
Subject: Sub7 (How original)
From: Stuart
Hi, im not one of those fools who cant use sub7, because i can. im just wondering if you can help me find a site that will let me download it. If you still need to download it, how do you know that you know how to use it, and that you're really not one of those fools who can't use Sub 7? Can you tell me my future, here's a "hint" that may help you: I'm not one of those bums that are on the streets that have no money because I have money, I was just wondering if you could show me where to quickly get a few million dollars without having to do anything.
"Where do they all come from", "why do they ask you (me)",
"why do they want to hack" are all questions that you and I normal people may wonder, and will just never get the answers to those questions.
before I go to sleep tonight I'm going to be sure to lock all of my doors, board up the windows from the inside, and then lock my bedroom door to ensure that none of the juvenile delinquents will not try to break into my house and steal all of my copies of Sub 7 that I keep in the closet. I think I'm up to two or three hundred now. I plan on making a few other copies tonight before I go to bed just so I can have them for the morning to put away in the closet for safe keeping.
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