|
 | | Like I said. Weird Fetishes. |
Some people have weird fetishes. What I mean by that is a strange desire for feet, balloons, or even one day being able to trade homes with their neighbors and remodel their living room to make it look better when you're looking into their window from yours across the street. Yes, that's right, I'm talking about the new wave of shows on both TLC and the Discovery Channel that involve at least one gay person and a bunch of pansies working to make their living quarters look better and more desirable so they get the right "vibes" from their furniture being strategically placed to increase their chances of winning the lottery and lessen their chances of being called gay. Those shows. Not Buffy the Vampire Slayer or CSI, that's next week.
Trading Spaces. People of all ages for some reason get a big kick out of this show. Some will actually stand in front of the TV set drooling in their underwear at the sight of a newly redesigned room which looks the same as the other rooms that they have redesigned. Why do so many people of all different ages like it, I don't know. It's like asking me "Why wasn't there a winner in the 2002 All Star Game?". The truth is I don't know, and I really don't care since I hate baseball. I don't know why they like the show, and I really don't care since I hate the show.
I do offer some possible solutions, however: Possible Reasons Why People Like Trading Spaces
Possible Reason Number One
It's very possible that a lot of trailer park trash watch Trading Spaces. As you may or may not know, all trailer park trash, similar to the Lloyds, don't live in the nicest homes and they want style and eloquence. So they figure that it's the next best thing to watch other people destroy their perfectly good-looking houses into mere trash not much unlike their current house. It makes them feel good about themselves that they're not the only ones in the world that live like that, and justifies their situation of being lazy and sitting around not working while watching Jerry Springer reruns.
 | | Work those walls! |
Possible Reason Number Two
Revenge. Like I said before, some people have some weird and messed up fetishes - this is one of them. There's no better way than to vent your anger towards your neighbor than seize control of their house for 24 hours and get to make it all different colors, tear down some paneling, light fixtures, and put up new curtains to make it so that they don't like it. HINT: Making the walls a bright pink would be a good idea to drive someone crazy. They do that in some jails for Women. They claim it works. (Right, make mad people even madder, smart idea). Personally, I would just replace their lights with strobe lights, cover up their windows with ply wood, and paint everything black to really piss them off, but that's just me.
Possible Reason Number Three
Gay people have to be with other gay people, right? What a good idea to check out fellow gays by watching Trading Spaces which airs a few times a day on TLC?! You don't have to register with some stupid service that will email you with emails that read "Lowell, meet other gay singles in your area right now!". If you're really gay enough and really thinking about looking for some action, you can even tape the episodes of Trading Spaces to a VHS tape so you can watch them again and again when you're in the "right mood" to view those hotties fixing furniture! Or you could use TiVo, but a VCR and VHS tapes are cheaper.
Possible Reason Number Four
You have given up on life. Along with your solid color sweat pants and sweat shirt that you wear around because you think it's "comfy", you also make an effort to watch Trading Spaces at least one time a day to help you relax and realize "I've given up on life" or maybe it's a silent cry for "Help me, I've given up on life!". Either way it can't be good. Pretty soon after this stage you'll find yourself watching The View every morning because you find it interesting and claims that there's nothing else better on TV as an excuse to watch it. Really, if you've ever seen that show more than one time on two different occasions you'll notice something very strange about every project they do. Every wall is a dark color, and there's almost always a light accent in front of the wall such as a border or a light trim. This is another reason why I utterly dislike Trading Spaces, real human beings that are straight would not want to live in a room that has very bright colors along with very cheap cloth over their expensive sofas.
Maybe next week I can go after all the Israeli News stations we have here in the United States all the sudden. They're starting to get quite bothersome now that I've been able to get in front of a TV for a few minutes a day.
|
