FaceBook is a utility that allows you to connect with people, exchange some words, photos, and so on. It’s a little different than the competition in the sense that it offers some privacy options where people need your permission to view your profile. You can even setup a limited profile and restrict what some of your friends can see.

OK, so that sounded like a great tool so I signed up. I figured it would be a way for me to keep contact with certain individuals. It started out pretty good, but then I quickly realized the true evilness of FaceBook. What it really is in the end is a tool for losers to feel like they are popular.

The other day, I received a friend request from a certain person I won’t name. I didn’t recognize the name or the picture but I did notice that my brother had that same person on his friend list. I asked him who the heck that person was. He replied that this was a person that used to work with us at fast food joint like 15 years ago.

OK… So because we worked a weekend shift for a brief period, and our conversations were limited to “I need a large fry and coke”, this person figures I am suddenly their friend? 15 years later? Please! REJECT REQUEST!

But that was only the beginning. You see, what happens with face book is that as soon as you get a few friends and show up on their friend list, their friends feel compelled to send you an invitation if they recognize your name. It doesn’t matter if you are actually friends or not, you went to the same school! It doesn’t matter that you never spoke in 20 years. Why? Because you went to the same school! And it doesn’t matter that you were being snobed by these people at school because you actually went TO THE SAME SCHOOL!!! So fucking what? REJECT! I have zero interest in reconnecting with you.

I wanted to use FaceBook to keep a small network of friends, to share photos with them, to share stories and sort of establish a little group. But no. It seems the whole planet wants to be part of my little group. Apparently, the more friends you have on FaceBook, the cooler you are. It becomes a competition, an obsession. It’s all about having friends.

The funny thing is, most of these people sign each other up, say “Hi, How’s it going?” and never speak again. What’s the point? In the end, they register hundreds of “friends” and then they spend their time stalking everyone’s profiles, desperately searching for more friends to invite. Is it just me, or is that not totally lame?

I’d like to point out that the button does say “friend request” and not “acquaintance request” or “I remotely remember you… I think… request”. I’m really not interested in talking to most of you. I’ve always been sort of a hermit anyway so don’t think that I suddenly want to share my pictures with you just because you happen to know my name. That’s the problem with FaceBook. People that would never see your pictures or hear about significant events in your life suddenly have access to all of it if you choose to accept them. You become an open book. That’s what most people end up becoming, and that’s their own fault. It seems a lot of people are hesitant to click the reject button, or the limited profile button because they don’t want to hurt the other person’s feelings. So they end up accepting the invites. So because you’re considerate, you’re exposing parts of your lives to certain individuals that you really wish didn’t get to see that side of you. But that’s your own damn fault I say. Next time, hit the damn reject button. Ultimately, the one thing that FaceBook has achieved is to show how moronic most people really are. Both those whose only goal is to have an impressively long friend’s list and those who accept people they don’t really like.

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