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We normally like to have a few articles per week, but as you can see this cannot always be done because the staff and I are only human, and as you know humans do get tired, do work, and do need some time to sleep. If we were getting paid vast amounts of money (Or stuff like booze or gum) to update this page, then it would be a different story. But since we're not, that's how it is, and that's how it's going to be until we do get vast amounts of money, or booze, or gum.
As you may or may not know, there is a "Serial Sniper" on the lose in the Washington D.C. area. If you don't know about this "Serial Sniper" and are living in the United States, I don't know where the hell you have been for the past 19 days given that it's the only thing that the media talks about now on the news. Every time you turn on the TV again you'll hear something like "We are waiting for an interview from the victim's brother's girlfriend's brother's aunt and she might be able to provide us with what shoe size the victim was wearing at the time of the shooting because she usually knows what shoe size the victim wears." Honestly, if you're reading this, and live in the United States, then I should hit you over the head with a tack hammer. I don't know where the hell you have been for the past few weeks.
You may also know that police are working "'round the clock" in order to capture the person or persons responsible and are also looking for a motive behind these slayings of people pumping their cars full of gas, buying stuff from stores such as Wal Mart or eating at a Ponderosa restaurant. The police have yet to find out who is doing these shootings, nor do they know why this person or persons are doing what they are doing. This maybe due to the fact that they are doing an interview every other minute telling the media that they are not wanted near the crime scenes and that they are still looking for the suspect with thousands of leads leading to no where.
Of course we cannot blame them for not knowing who this person is, or why they are doing what they are doing, but I am sure they have some guesses as to why they are doing what they are doing and are simply not telling us. Of course, I have some guesses as to why he or she is doing what they are doing, and am willing to share it with about two people that will actually read past the first sentence of this update before they realize this site does not have Brittney Spears naked or "fake Avril Lavigne nude pictures". Sorry guys. (Or girls...)  | | Look, a clown! |
Pathetic Reason Number One
Yes, these are all pathetic reasons why he (or she) would do something of this nature. I know, I was here when I wrote this. One of the first reasons that I can think of right off the club would be that he (or she) doesn't like Halloween. This person may have had his house egged by some "rly kewl teens" last year and he (or she) wants to make sure that it will not happen again this year. So he (or she) thought that if they cause enough panic throughout their community no one in their right minds will want to go Trick or Treating and risk their lives over "stupid candy". Or, more simply put, "If you fuck with me or my house on your stupid 'Mischief Night' I will put a cap in your ass, no questions asked". Little does he (or she) know, most teens that do egg houses or cars cannot take a hint. His (or her) house will still be egged this year despite his efforts into preventing Halloween from taking place. Sorry, guy.
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Pathetic Reason Number Two
If you have watched about .0000786 seconds of the news within the past, oh, 21 days you might begin to notice that all shootings take place at some form of store. All of these stores are supposed to be "fast" (IE: Fast Food, or Fast Service), and this person didn't find these places to be fast enough so they decided to show them a fast way to die. Maybe the line didn't move fast enough at Home Depot. Obviously this person didn't like that. So what did he do? He went back to his truck, got out his rifle, and shot the first person that came out of the store. Maybe this person didn't get his (or her) food fast enough from the Pondarosa. So what did he do? He went back to his truck, got out his rifle, and shot the first person that came out of the restaurant. Or maybe while picking up some art and craft supplies (Hey, you never know. Maybe this guy likes to sew or maybe he likes to knit) from Michaels the line didn't move fast enough, or they didn't have the right color yarn. So what did he do? You guessed it. He went out to his truck, broke out the rifle and shot the first person that came out of the store because he could not get pink and purple yarn.
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Pathetic Reason Number Three
After September 11th of 2001, the media has a tick for using the term "terrorism". They think if they use the word "terrorism" people will stop whatever they are doing (Including stopping on train tracks to listen to what they have to say) because they have just mentioned "the T word". They now take the word "terrorism", look up the exact meaning of the word, and whenever any event fits its description they'll say that it was "terrorism". This must be terrorism because this person WANTED to cause terror and chaos throughout the community! Even if he chose to slam his car into countless trees for no reason at all, it would still be terror because it was causing terror throughout the tree community. "How is this a reason?" you ask. It's not a reason. I know it isn't. Like I said before, I was here when I wrote this.
I'm sure the police have come up with much better ideas like that, such as "because he won the lottery" or "because he was on drugs" or even "because he couldn't buy a gun". Those are just a few that I thought might make this guy (or gal) tick and make him (or her) go on these rampages.
Some of you may also be wondering just why the hell I randomly put pictures of clowns in the text above. The reason why I did that is because some of the kids reading this like to look at pictures, and I thought that some clowns would make them laugh since, well, they like clowns and colorful things.
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